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"Whoever called it necking was a poor judge of anatomy."
Groucho Marx
"When the history of civilization is written, it will be a biological history and Margaret Sanger will be its heroine."
H.G. Wells
"Familiarity breeds contempt - and children."
Mark Twain
"Of the delights of this world, man cares most for sexual intercourse. He will go to any length for it-risk fortune, character, reputation, life itself."
Mark Twain
"Don't knock masturbation - it's sex with someone I love."
Woody Allen
"Sex relieves tension - love causes it."
Woody Allen
"Sex between a man and a woman can be absolutely wonderful - provided you get between the right man and the right woman."
Woody Allen
"What do I know about sex? I'm a married man."
Tom Clancy
"Flies spread disease - keep yours zipped."
Author Unknown
"I think I could fall madly in bed with you."
Author Unknown
"A chicken and an egg are lying in bed. The chicken is smoking a cigarette with a satisfied smile on its face and the egg is frowning and looking put out. The egg mutters to no one in particular, "I guess we answered that question."
Author Unknown
"Love is a matter of chemistry, but sex is a matter of physics."
Author Unknown
"Obscenity is whatever gives the Judge an erection."
Author Unknown
"The best contraceptive is a glass of cold water: not before or after, but instead."
Author Unknown
"Don't worry, it only seems kinky the first time."
Author Unknown
"Do infants enjoy infancy as much as adults enjoy adultery?"
Author Unknown
"I once knew a woman who offered her honor So I honored her offer And all night long I was on her and off her."
Author Unknown
"An erection is like the Theory of Relativity - the more you think about it, the harder it gets."
Author Unknown
"The difference between light and hard is that you can sleep with a light on."
Author Unknown
"Kinky is using a feather. Perverted is using the whole chicken."
Author Unknown
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