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"An intellectual is a person who's found one thing that's more interesting than sex."
Aldous Huxley
"Chastity: The most unnatural of the sexual perversions."
Aldous Huxley
"Flies spread disease - keep yours zipped."
Author Unknown
"I think I could fall madly in bed with you."
Author Unknown
"A chicken and an egg are lying in bed. The chicken is smoking a cigarette with a satisfied smile on its face and the egg is frowning and looking put out. The egg mutters to no one in particular, "I guess we answered that question."
Author Unknown
"Love is a matter of chemistry, but sex is a matter of physics."
Author Unknown
"Obscenity is whatever gives the Judge an erection."
Author Unknown
"The best contraceptive is a glass of cold water: not before or after, but instead."
Author Unknown
"Don't worry, it only seems kinky the first time."
Author Unknown
"Do infants enjoy infancy as much as adults enjoy adultery?"
Author Unknown
"I once knew a woman who offered her honor So I honored her offer And all night long I was on her and off her."
Author Unknown
"An erection is like the Theory of Relativity - the more you think about it, the harder it gets."
Author Unknown
"The difference between light and hard is that you can sleep with a light on."
Author Unknown
"Kinky is using a feather. Perverted is using the whole chicken."
Author Unknown
"I'd like to meet the man who invented sex and see what he's working on now."
Author Unknown
"I'm not cheap, but I am on special this week."
Author Unknown
"Never let the little head do the thinking for the big head."
Author Unknown
"Pornography is the attempt to insult sex, to do dirt on it."
D.H. Lawrence
"My reaction to porn films is as follows: After the first ten minutes, I want to go home and screw. After the first 20 minutes, I never want to screw again as long as I live."
Erica Jong
"Sex at age ninety is like trying to shoot pool with a rope."
George Burns
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